I have a friend who plays video games almost every day. She plays them maybe an hour each day from what I know, and longer if she’s under stress because playing them helps her to relax. I can relate because I, too, play video games. Instead of trying to see where she’s coming from or trying to play a game with her, my friend’s husband never fails to say what a waste of time playing video games is. Having someone you love shit-talk something you love to do of course makes you feel bad, so she gets onto herself about playing them.
With how stressful life can be and how hard being an adult is, everyone should have a hobby. Having at least one hobby challenges your mind. This can be beneficial in managing stress, experiencing better sleep, and even enhancing memory. Participating in an activity you enjoying doing every day can prevent burnout, as well. Instead of worrying about everything going on around you all of the time, work included, you can carve out some time for yourself just doing what you love.
Merriam-Webster defines a hobby as: “a pursuit outside one’s regular occupation engaged in especially for relaxation.” Why am I defining what a hobby is? The reason is when the word comes to mind, I’ve always pictured stamp collecting, building model airplanes, or painting. I never thought of video games as a hobby. It’s likely that other people’s opinions have fueled that idea my entire life. Many people who do not play video games hate them for reasons I don’t entirely understand.
Video games get such a bad rap from other people who do not play them. Those people want to talk about what a waste of time they are and yet sit down and watch hours of television every night, like my friend’s husband. I have heard it not just in her situation, but in far too many to count. My husband’s coworkers give him a lot of shit for playing video games, too. They tell him it’s a waste of time, games are for kids, yadda yadda.
It doesn’t just end with video games, either. I’ve been a reader my entire life and even that isn’t safe from occasional criticism.
“So you just read? You don’t do anything else?” “I hate reading. It’s so boring.” “That would put me to sleep.” These are all responses I’ve heard after telling someone I read books. Okay, but I never asked you to read with me…? If you read my last post, one of the pieces of advice that I give to break generational trauma is productivity does not determine your worth. People seem to forget that hobbies are not meant to be productive. Sometimes they can be but more than anything, they are there to help you to relax.
Before beating yourself up about whatever you do as a hobby, here is something important to remember. Hell, to live by. Anything you enjoy doing is not time wasted. Say it out loud! Anything you enjoy doing is not time wasted.
Don’t let anybody shame you for doing something that brings you joy. Life is hard. Depending on our jobs and workload, that can make our lives even more stressful. Most of us try to balance our home and work life to some degree, too, which can cause even more pressure. Hobbies can make all of that stress, fear, and anxiety disappear for a few minutes. Not only that, it gives us something to look forward to after a long day.
If people in your life speaking negatively about your hobby is making you feel bad, consider finding people with similar interests to spend time with. We can still love the people we love even if they don’t understand why we choose to spend our free time the way we do. Side note: it’s one thing to make a comment here and there, but to constantly make you feel bad about the way you spend your time is unacceptable. You should consider kicking that person to the curb because anybody who can down you constantly doesn’t take your feelings or relationship into consideration.
If you don’t have a hobby already, consider finding one and you may find new friends along the way.
A few hobbies to try:
- Geocaching- There are many apps for this, some of them free. My kids, my mom, and I all have gone geocaching a few times already and plan to do many more in the future. It’s like a treasure hunt! An app has the coordinates marked and you go find whatever the treasure is. Usually, it’s something small, and it’s encouraged that you leave something at least similar value or better for the next person to find.
- Hiking- Hiking is self-explanatory, I know, but there are many resources to find good trails that weren’t around years ago. They are ranked by difficulty, too, which you may not know as a beginner. Consider using the internet to find trails near you.
- Reading- I’m convinced a reader exists in every one of us. If you tell me you don’t like to read, I’ll tell you that you have not found the right book yet. There are so many good books out there. From horror to sci-fi, fantasy to smut then all of the genres in between, there’s bound to be something that tickles your toes. Just try something!
- Cooking- Do you like to eat? We all do! Pick your favorite kind of food and look up instruction videos on how to cook it. Even if you learn one recipe, it’s one you didn’t know before.
- Physical Exercise- Running and weight training can be hobbies if you enjoy doing them. Both are great for your health and can improve your stress management even more so you’re getting extra benefits!
- Video Games- Yes, of course I’m mentioning video games. I have a similar theory about video games as I do with reading. If you say you don’t enjoy video games, I’m going to tell you that you haven’t found the right video game yet. There are many different genres of games: puzzles, shooters, RPGs.
No matter what you pick, I have faith in you. And if you don’t like it, no big deal. At least you tried something. And remember anything you enjoy doing is not time wasted.
Invoke the wonder, command the power.
Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash