I am in my thirties, so I remember the Before. In the Before, no one posted what they did every moment of the day. People didn’t have anywhere to post pictures of their food or write a long rant for people to read. In the Before, you didn’t have the internet at your fingertips with an audience to read your every thought. These days, we are connected to everyone by the little rectangle box in our pockets. The internet is a strange place, full of people who want their lives validated through social media posts. While social media can be good when limited, it can also take a turn for the worse. Constant exposure can drain your battery, impede your time, and take a toll on your mental health.
Being Plugged in Can Drain Your Battery
I am happy to say I was around for MySpace. For those of you who do not know, MySpace was the first social media platform to reach a huge audience of people. It was worldwide around 2005. The social media scene was much different then, and many people just spent time customizing their MySpace pages with cool backgrounds and music. Ah, nostalgia.
When I log into social media now, I see anything from someone’s to-do list to a paragraph-long rant about what is going on in the world today. Post after post of negativity, all bombarding my brain at a rapid pace, and if I get stuck in the loop of watching videos, I find myself scrolling through all of the hateful comments people leave. I could say that people who go out of their way to be ugly do not have enough going on in their lives, but here I am, reading through all of the comments for twenty minutes so what does that say about me?
Another thing that’s rampant on social media is being bombarded with ads all of the time. The latest gadgets you need to buy, or the newest toy you need to purchase for your child. Buy this contraption to make your life easier. If I allow myself to be distracted by all of the bright ads, I have a list by the end of the week of things that I want to purchase. This leads to me being aggravated because I don’t have the hundreds of dollars free to spend, then me getting stressed about finances. Any kind of prolonged stress triggers my go-to quick escape: social media. It’s an endless cycle.
Much like the saying “you are what you eat,” the same can be said for your mind, too. You are what you eat directly relates to what you feed your body. You are what you feed your mind, as well. If all you’re looking up all day is negative content, whether it be news or trolls on the internet, then that is all you’re going to be: negative. On the other hand, if you watch things that make you feel good, you’re going to feel good and you’re going to project that version of you into the world.
My husband is the perfect example of this. He watches politics a lot of the time, especially when the presidential debates were going on. Not only that, but he makes sure he knows what’s going on. He’s up to date on any of the latest evils whirling about in the real world. I’ve noticed that too much of that puts him in a major funk. I do not watch the news, and for a good reason. Yes, I think it’s important to know what’s happening in the world. However, nothing is important enough to mess with my peace. I’ve worked too hard to obtain it. Therefore, my exposure to the news is very slight, and he knows that’s a boundary for me. He knows he can watch as much as he wants to, just don’t tell me about it. And I tell him to be aware of how it affects him, because being aware is the most important part.
Your Time Management Suffers
The moment I wake up, I have my phone on my hand. Instead of waking up and doing something productive or at the very least something I like, I find myself scrolling for at least an hour on social media. Not for anything in particular, either. I’ll browse through the videos or scroll through comments on someone’s post. It really eats up time, too. By the time I check the clock again, at least an hour has gone by in what seems like the blink of an eye.
For a while, it was an extension of me. Everywhere I went, my phone went, too, even if I was just moving around the house. Which goes back to being available to everybody all of the time, because that was another reason why. The second my phone chimed, it was in my hand. This can make it especially hard for someone who is already busy to complete everything they want for that day. If I’m starting things and having to stop so I can check my phone. Or if I’m working on my blog and I reach for it to check social media, then I realize an hour has passed and I need to do something else. Being plugged in makes it difficult to get tasks completed.
All of the notifications and messages were getting to me, too. People with the idea that you are supposed to text them back or call them back immediately, the second they contact you. I got stuck in this loop for a bit. I would call or message them back within minutes of them contacting me and before I knew it, I was behind on shit I needed to do. This left me feeling tired and spread too thin. I have a life, after all. Things going on that demand my attention right then and there. I work, homeschool my kids, and (try to) keep up with the housework. I can’t answer everything immediately.
Let’s say it’s not just about being productive, either. That little phone sucked up time that I wish I could have been using for something else, even if that something was doing quests on a video game I love. Reading a book I enjoy. Playing outside with my kids. I know for some people, the argument is that they love to scroll on social media, and that’s okay if you get genuine enjoyment out of that. I didn’t, though. I tricked myself into thinking I did for a while. The hours worth of videos I would watch and I would find one or two videos that made me laugh. I would use that as validation for the continued routine of mindless scrolling. I would much rather be enjoying my life. Instead, I was on a social media platform, watching other people live their lives. It’s strange.
How to Unplug
Every time I would take a break from social media before, I would make a big announcement post that I was disappearing for an unknown amount of time to take some ‘me time.’ I did this for a while, every couple of months. I would stay gone for about a week, then come back and it would be the same routine again. I would cut out social media when I began to notice all the telltale signs again that I needed a break.
Now I realize I don’t owe anyone an explanation. It goes back to the fact that you own your time. You don’t owe anybody an explanation of where you are, what you’re doing or why you’re not messaging back, and those who are truly your friend will understand that and will let you have your time.
My point is, it doesn’t have to be anything big and elaborate. If you wish, just notify a few friends that you’re stepping away for a bit. It’s only as dramatic as you make it. But be aware, the more dramatic the exit, the more you may itch to come back.
This past time, I messaged a couple of close friends that I was taking a break from social media for a little bit, and that I would be available through text. I’ve been unplugged from social media (and everyone who is not close) for about 3 weeks so far. I haven’t planned a designated amount of time to be away, but I have really enjoyed the time so far. I’ve worked on my blog, made Christmas cookies with my girls, finished three books, started a show series back up, and reconnected with a few video games I’ve not been playing. I’ve been learning this new path of spirituality and practicing every day. I feel more fulfilled, for sure. I don’t feel so drained, and I know there’s more to come, too. Now to get some exercise in.
Conclusion
There’s nothing wrong with social media, truly. As long as it’s regulated and it doesn’t completely take over our lives. We all deserve time to rest and recharge. If your phone is going off all the time because of the next notification or message, when are you getting unwind time? Rest is vital for us to not burn out, especially those of us who are empaths. What is right for you may not be right for someone else so be aware of how you feel and do what makes you happy.
Invoke the wonder, command the power.